“Homicide Victims Rarely Talk to Police,” and Other Horrible Headlines

From a friend, who got them from a friend, who got them from someone else, here’s a collection of newspaper headlines that don’t quite accomplish what the writer set out to accomplish. Anyone who has ever written or published anything can surely sympathize — and laugh. (P.S.: Are any of them real?)




Leave A Comment

Comments are moderated and generally will be posted if they are on-topic and not abusive.



View All Comments »
  1. slimpy says:


    Did you guys just get the internet today?

    Well-loved. Like or Dislike: Thumb up 29 Thumb down 1
  2. Andy Bechtel says:

    The “morgue” headline from The News & Observer isn’t real. Here’s more: http://wp.me/plJ6z-1bV

    Thumb up 2 Thumb down 2
  3. EP says:

    Don’t you mean “All from Jay Leno because you can tell from the highlighters that he used them on Headlines”?

    Thumb up 4 Thumb down 3
  4. Paul S Vigil says:

    HILARIOUS!! I was roaring with laughter!

    Thumb up 1 Thumb down 4
  5. Eric M. Jones. says:


    1) These are mostly spoofs. Verifying them is tough these days.
    2) Having worked in the news-biz (UPI), I can tell you that the news editors are GREAT at language and they know damned well if they are putting a little humor into print…which they often do. Your humor is based on the notion that they goofed. I’ll put my money elsewhere.

    Hey…When the ES neon went dark on the ESSEX house–it was paid for.

    Thumb up 6 Thumb down 4
  6. Kari says:

    Did you see the “Santorum Blasts Obama in Cumming Rally” headline during the primaries last year?

    Thumb up 1 Thumb down 2
  7. KK says:

    “Hospitals resort to hiring doctors” actually is a real headline. This may seem strange to the lay public but almost all doctors in the hospital are NOT employees of that hospital. They are self employed and have privileges to practice at that hospital. Hospitals will direct employ doctors particularly when there is a shortage of a speciality that’s needed.

    Thumb up 4 Thumb down 1
  8. Patrick says:

    good laugh

    Thumb up 0 Thumb down 3